I am not here for Kale apologists and I don’t believe in your ministry. You know the people who just insist that you haven’t found someone to cook it right. Is this leaf a magic kettle that you gotta rub perfect so the genie (and good taste) can pop out? That’s too much work! Do I gotta sing kale a heartfelt love song so it can soften up and be delicious? Why must I bribe kale with property and good music before it gets behavior? It’s so high maintenance. Is spinach busy? Me and spinach can talk because it’s a bit less involved.
Folks be talmbout “you just gotta massage it.” DID KALE BUY THIS SPECIAL ON GROUPON?? Why do I need to sit up here and rub its shoulders for it to be appetizing? Who got time for this high-faluting veggie? The only food I cater to is jollof rice and even it doesn’t require pampering like this.
Will this fancy-pants mall include a sporting goods store called, wait for it, Logan’s Run?
Thank you, and good night!